Book Clubs Should be Entertaining -- Not Work
By Kimberly McFarlin

I am involved in two different book clubs, requiring me to read a book a month and then take an evening or an afternoon to meet with others to discuss the book. Another well-intentioned obligation that I fail miserably at? Sometimes. A great way to spend time with friends and meet new people? Always.

I know many people feel that with work and other social and family obligations they are too busy to join a book club. They are under the mistaken belief, however, that you must actually have to read the book to enjoy a book club. This is simply not true. For example, there have been several occasions that I have not read the book for the meeting that I attend every even month. This group is made up of ten to twelve women, most of whom I have known since high school. We generally meet on a Monday evening, carrying on our discussion over dinner and wine. Although the book is the jumping off point for our discussions, actual reference to the book rarely exceeds 15 minutes. The real conversations center around the current events in our lives -- jobs, vacations, boyfriends/husbands, wedding plans, children. For example, a discussion of the Nanny Diaries led to a discussion of child-care issues in general. Even though I did not actually read the book, nor do I have children, I was nonetheless able to contribute to the conversation. It does help to give some weight to your opinion, however, if you appear to have some relevant experience on the topic - such as having read the book!

On the other hand, there are occasions when failure to read the book and/or attend the meeting does induce guilt. For example, for the book club that I attend every "odd" month I chose for us to read Rabbit Run by John Updike. Although I had read it in high school, I could not actually remember it and I did not make it to the Sunday morning meeting. I definitely felt badly about recommending a book to the group and then not attending the meeting to hear how much everyone hated it and how depressing they found it.

So why join a book club? Why not just read whatever you want on your own time and not obligate yourself to another chore? Isn't it enough to read the piles of technical and legal journals falling out of your inbox? But here is what many without a book club or two do not understand - it is fun! A book club discussion does not have to resemble your college English course. Discussions can be free-form exchanges of ideas, with everyone contributing a little of their experience, thoughts and ideas. I personally don't prescribe to following set questions in the back of the book, as some authors or publishers have started to provide to accommodate book clubs. Instead, I believe the best discussions occur over a glass of wine, wandering from the book to examples from our own lives. Book clubs are a way to stimulate ourselves to think and discuss what is going on around us.

In addition, I do not believe that I would have the motivation to read much outside of work if it weren't for feeling a little obligated to actually go get the book chosen by the group. For me, I always have a million things that I want to do on a list in the back of my mind, but unless I commit myself to making the time for it, I seldom do more than think about them. This tendency not to do that which we are not required to do is captured in the theme of one of my book clubs - "Things I Should Have Read in High School, But Didn't." With this group, I have read (or at least attempted) a number of novels, including Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez and A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole; short stories, including several Sherlock Holmes mysteries; plays, including Tennessee William's play Suddenly Last Summer; and non-fiction selections such as Sigmund Freud's Civilization and its Discontents. My other book club reads contemporary novels -- Oprah book club picks, such as Cane River by Lalita Tademy, and The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen and anything that we hear about that sounds interesting. My favorite book that I read with this group (yes, actually finished cover to cover!) was Behind the Scenes at the Museum by Kate Atkinson. But for the book clubs, I probably never would have read these books.

So should you join a book club or start one with friends or co-workers? Sure, absolutely! But it should not be an onerous burden in your life that causes pangs of guilt. Do not make the fact that you have not bought the book, let alone read it, be the reason you avoid members of your book club when you see them at the water cooler or in the gym. Your book club should be fun. Your book club should be a place where you can share a good meal and a glass of wine and contemplate the world and your place in it. It should not feel like work! If you hate the book, you do not have to finish it. If you did not understand what the author was getting at, there is a good possibility that no one else did either. No one is getting a grade and you do not need to take an incomplete if you cannot show up for the meeting. Most of all -- enjoy the company of friends... otherwise, you might as well just read whatever you want, whenever you want and not stress yourself out trying to finish the book on time!